One-on-one Spotlight: Sarah Farris

4/10/2018

Sarah Farris, Head Matchmaker at Simply Matchmaking, shares some valuable insight and advice on today's modern dating landscape and how to succeed in finding that special someone. She's also the Founder of Vibe Elevated - and as a Reiki Master Teacher, Intuitive Energy Reader and Certified Holistic Life Coach she helps people elevate their lives to become responsible for the energy they bring to the table. Keep reading to see her thoughts on how to be your best self - and start attracting the right people!

What do you love most about being a part of Simply Matchmaking?

I love meeting such different and interesting people; it’s always fascinating to hear about someone’s individual journey, what they’ve learned, and why they’re here today. Every single interview is unique. Human connection is a big part of what fuels me, and meeting our new members is always an adventure--you never know what story you might hear or what you might learn from someone. Sitting down, getting to know someone, and hearing about the ups and downs they’ve moved through never feels like work or a job--it’s truly a privilege.

What advice might you give someone who is nervous about working with a matchmaker?

We work with people of all different ages in various life stages, so whether you’re dating again after a 30-year marriage, have never had a relationship, or are somewhere in the middle, know that we’ve worked with someone like you. I think there’s this mentality of “am I the only one?” that some people have when they meet with us because they’re nervous that their particular set of circumstances is unappealing for potential matches or that they stand out in the wrong ways. We’ve worked with people who are divorced three times, widowed twice, never been kissed, only done long distance, etc., so there’s no such thing as “normal” in our book.

Come in--you have nothing to lose. You’ll meet with Matt who is such a warm, kind person and you’ll absolutely feel comfortable with him. If you hear about how our service works and decide it’s not for you, there are no strings attached and no obligation to become a member. And if you feel like it’s a good fit, you can move forward with your interview!

How does your Reiki work translate to the matchmaking world and vice versa?

Through my business, I work one-on-one with clients and, as a professional intuitive, I need to be completely in tune with the subtext of what we’re working on or what’s coming up in conversation. I’m naturally good at reading people and understanding them on a foundational level, even in very short periods of time, so that skill set seamlessly integrates with interviewing new members at Simply Matchmaking. I operate from a perspective of both instinct and logic, so it’s a very comprehensive approach to getting to know someone in an hour-long interview.

What is a common mistake that people make when dating?

I see people who get too wrapped up in the minutiae of their more trivial “must-haves” or get too attached to the idea of a person that they actually miss someone who is right for them. Yes, it’s valuable to be clear on what you want and your non-negotiables, but don’t get so carried away that you limit the pool of great people you could potentially meet.

For example, many women will say, “I will not date a guy shorter than 6’2”.” But what if you set that parameter and a fantastic person came along who was 6’? Does 2 inches of height really matter that much?

It’s also easy to get wrapped up in the idea of someone, especially when online dating. If you see a guy online and he’s an attorney, avid runner, and graduated summa cum laude from an Ivy League, you’re going to make assumptions--it’s human nature. When we create that story before actually getting to know someone and letting that person tell us who they really are, we blind ourselves to critical information.

Any advice for a blind date?

One thing to remember and one piece of advice: Remember that the other person is probably just as nervous as you are! Be yourself and don’t fluff components of who you are just because you think it’s what the other person wants to hear. This person deserves to get a realistic picture of who you are, otherwise your long-term compatibility will not be as strong as it could otherwise be.

Why work with Simply Matchmaking?

I constantly hear from new members that they learn so much about what they’re looking for and what sort of partner they want through their interview process. We ask pretty specific questions about your preferences and, for many people, that’s the first time they’re actually thinking through what that might look like. It’s really important to have a clear picture of your top preferences, your non-negotiables--and so on--before you jump into the dating pool, so I think the interview is a great opportunity to establish a solid foundation that you can continually reference as you go on dates.

I also think there’s tremendous value in receiving feedback from each date you go on because this feedback not only will serve you in the dating world, but in other parts of your life, too. When you are going on dates outside of Simply Matchmaking, whether it’s via an online dating platform or through a friend who set you up, you’ll never receive feedback that’s useful for your overall personal development like you could with Simply Matchmaking. Even if you don’t end up marrying someone you meet through us, that feedback could shape the way you present yourself in a job interview, around your friends, or on future dates.